Friday, July 24, 2009

I’ve just had one of those moments…

You know when you’re having a bad day?  Things don’t seem to be going right, stress level is high, all you want to do is just hide under the covers until the next day?  One of those kinds of days.

Well, I’m having one of those days…correction…I was having one of those days.

Then it happened.  I might have just taken one of the top 5 shits of my life. 

This shit has seriously turned my entire day around.  I emerged from the bathroom a new man.  Really, this was one of those poos where you sit down and it’s like the gates of hell are unleashed.  You shrink a waist size or two, and all of the sudden you have a six pack. 

The best comparison I can give you is it’s like one of those times where you have sex, and you realize that you’re lasting much longer than usual and your sober.  You’re kind of like “this is odd, I’m not even close” so you say, “fuck it, I’m going for broke” and you turn into a young Peter North.  

Anyway.  I’m not sure what caused this shit to happen.  But, my day has gone from bad to awesome in one sitting. 

That is all.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Man, even I find this a little dirty

So, if you haven’t seen the story Josh Selby, let me give you a little bit of background here…

Josh Selby was Tennessee’s prize basketball recruit.  The proverbial crown jewel of the class.  Selby’s a consensus top 10 national recruit, and he committed to UTenn back in September of last year. Now all of the sudden, after attending a basketball camp with his mother, Selby has decommitted to UTenn and is now looking at Kentucky and Oregon.

Now, given the landscape of recruiting in 2009, the commitment/decommitment rituals of the high school student are nothing to be surprised at.  Shit, when I was 17/18, I was emo-confused about what I was going to eat for dinner.  So, why is Selby’s case so special?

Hint Number 1: Tennessee is an Adidas school
Hint Number 2: Kentucky and Oregon are Nike schools
Hint Number 3: The camp that Selby attended was a Nike camp

See where this is going? 

The man at the center of this controversy is a man named William Wesley.  Name ring a bell?  How’s about his nickname, “Worldwide Wes”?   His Wikipedia page...

See, no one knows how or what the hell purpose Wes has, but he’s always at the center of these things.

So, to recap:

1) Selby recruits to Tennessee, an Adidas school
2) Selby attends a Nike camp with his mother
3) Mother chats with William Wesley, noted Nike shill and good friend of John Calipari (now coach at Kentucky. Former coach at Memphis where both of Selby’s cousins play)
4) Selby de-commits from Tennessee and now is interested in Kentucky.

The NCAA seems sit on a pretty high perch when it comes to slapping people with recruiting restrictions…loopholes sure are fun.

Looks like the Lamar Odom contract talks with the Lakers not going so good...



Giggle.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Disagreeing with Rick Reilly…

I'm going to admit that I've been a Rick Reilly fan since I discovered Sports Illustrated as a kid.   For all his "Reilly-ness", his stories always had my attention, and I thought his approach was certainly different.

I followed Reilly through SI, and now onto ESPN.com  What I've noticed now is that a) I'm more cynical than ever b) Reilly is an old man with good ol' days syndrome or c) I'm easily irritated.

It's probably all three.

Anyway, his latest piece might have been one of the asinine things I've ever read.

"Tiger Woods has outgrown those Urkel glasses he had as a kid. Outgrown the crazy hair. Outgrown a body that was mostly neck.

When will he outgrow his temper?

The man is 33 years old, married, the father of two. He is paid nearly $100 million a year to be the representative for some monstrously huge companies, from Nike to Accenture. He is the world's most famous and beloved athlete.

And yet he spent most of his two days at Turnberry last week doing the Turn and Bury. He'd hit a bad shot, turn and bury his club into the ground in a fit. It was two days of Tiger Tantrums -- slamming his club, throwing his club and cursing his club. In front of a worldwide audience."

Let me get this straight.  The guy is a corporate automaton who maintains a public presence the way Nike and IEG expect.  He has achieved a role model status that not many (if any) have reached and does so, but we're going to get mad at him because he gets mad? On a golf course?

Really?

Look, I've played golf with hot heads and with serene people all the same, and every now and then, a curse word is released into the world.  Apparently, that makes Rick Reilly cry.

"It's disrespectful to the game, disrespectful to those he plays with and disrespectful to the great players who built the game before him. Ever remember Jack Nicklaus doing it? Arnold Palmer? When Tom Watson was getting guillotined in that playoff to Stewart Cink, did you see him so much as spit? Only one great player ever threw clubs as a pro -- Bobby Jones -- and he stopped in his 20s when he realized how spoiled he looked."

Does that sell the game? 

Make no mistake, Tiger is selling the PGA and himself.  People don't want calm, cool and collected or else Tim Duncan would be more marketable and attractive than LeBron James and Kobe Bryant combined. 

On the course is the one place that Tiger can be Tiger in the public eye.  He can't do it at the podium, he can't do it in the interview chair, he can't do it walking the street with his family.  On the golf course, he can be in the public eye as well as be what he is, the greatest golfer to play the game.  If part of that means that Tiger shows emotion and releases a stream of curse words that kids probably hear on KISS FM anyway, then so be it.  Why is it so bad that the world sees Tiger be upset when something goes wrong?  Is that not better than us apologizing, giving him the shot back and saying "do it until your happy because everyone wins?"  You know, follow the pussy-fication of America's youth that happens today?

Should Tiger be Happy Gilmore and launch clubs and beat the shit out of someone?  No.  Should he be allowed to show extreme displeasure when something goes awry that is completely his fault?  Very honestly, yes.  Golf etiquette and showing emotion can co-exist while keeping golf a "gentleman's game".

By the by, Rick...is saying golf is a gentleman's game versus the brats in the NBA, baseball and football a subtle way of you saying "golf doesn't like black people"?  (Relax! I kid. I kid.)

Monday, July 20, 2009

So, where have we been?

Let me remind everyone of something, we aren’t paid to do this blog.  It’s a hobby.  When we have free time, we post our thoughts or stupid shit like pictures we find or videos we find.

I apologize that we haven’t been able to post as frequently as we’d like.  Jobs, life, and other stuff tend to get in the way.

We’ll post when we get time, and that’s that.  If you want to see stuff up here every day that’s new, you’re more than welcome to subsidize my income.  Until then, keep checking back for updates, and don’t hesitate to use our link list over there on the right.  It’s where we steal most of our shit from anyway.

The Erin Andrews Story

 I love EA as much as the next man…but doesn’t she kind of look like Lane Kiffin in this picture?

If you haven’t read a single blog since Friday, you might have missed the whole story regarding how Erin Andrews was videotaped in her hotel room, nude, ironing her clothes and straightening her hair.

(Hello, Google searchers.  Sorry you didn’t find the videos. Please, feel free to peruse the site anyway.)

Anyway, I actually did manage to see the videos before the whole thing blew up and ESPN lawyers fired the internet.   I’ll say this much.  You’re really desperate for material if a blonde, blurry picture of a nude woman who kind of looks like Erin Andrews for a split second does it for you.  Head to Brazzers and you’ll be better off.

Anyway, I guess my view on this is, yes it’s a pretty disgusting thing that people would obviously premeditatedly plan to video tape this woman in her room, but who roams around a hotel room naked with a curling iron and a clothes iron?  Seriously.  I lived in hotel rooms for about 6 years, and at no point in time did I think to iron my clothes or style my hair in the nude.   I’m not saying that I didn’t walk from the bathroom to the closet/suitcase nude, but, really, she was starkers with a hot curling iron next to her jubblies and a clothes iron next to her holy triangle.  Ballsy is the word I want to use, yet it seems inappropriate.

Yes, this post had zero relevance…I just wanted to drive traffic by mentioning the story. 

Did Brock Lesnar’s actions legitimize pro wrestling or tarnish MMA?

Big, how much for you to get this tattoo?

So, last weekend at UFC 100, Brock Lesnar defeated Frank Mir to become the “undisputed” heavyweight champion of the UFC.  After the fight, he proceeded to flip off the crowd, demean Frank Mir, and give a “WWE-like” victory speech.

This seemed to cause an uproar because…well, I’m not too sure.

I’m not a huge MMA fan.  I’m more of a boxing guy, but I watch MMA on the periphery with the guys, and I know who’s who.  Here’s the thing…exactly what is so wrong about showing a little bit of personality?

Is Dana White that terrified of being lumped with Vince McMahon?  Does he think that if his guys show some personality that they’ll be seen as on par with pro wrestlers instead of as fighters? 

I’m pretty sure even the most hardcore of MMA fan isn’t the same kind of guy as the baseball purist here or Joe Buck complaining about Randy Moss’s touchdown celebrations.  The whole god damn sport is based on raw brutality and primal instinct. 

Guys talking trash, showing personality and creating rivalries is what drives interest.  Period.  If you ask me, the entire argument against Lesnar and his actions are wholly based in the fact that he was a former pro wrestler and MMA junkies are so terrified of being lumped with the WWE and its fan base.  

Hey, what about….

Nope, still not mentioning them unless they slide out of contention.

Ok, I’m so going to see if my girl will drink a Sprite this way (SLIGHTLY NSFW)…

Actually, it’s really NSFW…so, turn the volume down and don’t let anyone look over your shoulder.

Hat tip: Warming Glow

Tony’s a free man!

Well, it hasn’t exactly been a secret.  I hate Jessica Simpson.  Hate her.  I can find a big tittied, overweight blond anywhere in Dallas. Why should this bitch be famous?

Anyway, if you didn’t see the story (and I’m not sure why), Tony pulled a move that I personally find so awesome, it brought a tear to my eye.  Allow me to show you how I believe it went…

Jessica: It’s my birthday coming up tomorrow.

Tony: Golf. Golf. Golf. Golf. Golf. Bobby Carpenter.

Jessica: I want to have a party.

Tony: Boat. Boat. Golf. Jason Witten. Guitar Hero.

Jessica: How about a Barbie and Ken party?

Tony: Go—…what?

Jessica: A Barbie and Ken Party!  I can be Barbie!!!

Tony: That’s it. I’m out.  Peace, bitch.

And…scene.

You might think that I’d be happy that Tony’s single.  I am happy that he’s lost the weight.  However, as much as I love Tony Romo, he’s a big ol’ douche. 

My fear is that now he’s going to be more focused on partying and being a douche that he’s going to be that much less focused on football…and this is supposed to be his breakout season.

Jerry’s (probably more Steven) made all the moves this off-season to make this team Tony Romo’s.  Gone went Owens.  Garrett has simplified the playbook and made it run-heavier.  Marty B has kept people entertained. (Captain Crunch!!!!)  Now it’s Tony’s turn to show that the right moves were made.

Think about it.  For all the crap Owens pulled, was he ever out of shape?  Was he ever missing practices?  Didn’t his teammates, for the most part, love him and follow him?   Can you say the same thing about Tony Romo? 

So…the Mavs sure have changed

Not that long ago, I was lamenting Donnie Nelson’s horrendous draft choice of the frog legged wunderkind, Roddy Beauxbois.   In fact, I believe I claimed that he had to do something to show me that the Mavs were making an effort to change.

So, let’s review what he’s pulled off since…

-Re-signed Jason Kidd.  Got him at a bit of a high price, but let’s be honest, it had to be done.  There was no other option unless they went for a stop-gap solution in a Jarrett Jack or Jomario Moon.

-Traded for Shawn Marion.  Now, if we were playing fantasy basketball, I think this a great idea.  You’re getting a guy that a few years ago was averaging a double-double and was known for playing lock down defense.  He even had a great nickname, “The Matrix”.  I like the move though.  Gives a slasher and allows an interesting rotation across the 2-3-4 among Howard, Marion, Terry, Dirk, Singleton, etc.  The problem here was that it all depended on the Mavericks landing or securing a 5 that was more reliable/athletic than Erick Dampier.

-The Marcin Gortat experiment.  So, let’s review what happened.  Gortat wants to come to Dallas.  He got the full MLE and guaranteed minutes.  Dallas was SO SURE that he’d sign, they let Orlando sign Brandon Bass.  (There’s a whole science behind why Bass was never going to play in Dallas, but for all intents and purposes, they didn’t re-sign him because they thought they pocketed Gortat.)  Turns out Orlando fucked Dallas in both holes by matching Gortat.

So now what?  The Mavs would have been a VERY VERY impressive squad with Gortat.  Not because he was great, but he allowed the flexibility and athletic ability to run that rotation across the 2-3-4.  Now, they’re bare on the 5.  Dallas has to get an athletic center because we all know that Damp ain’t it.   Watch the trade block after 30 games.

Rick Carlisle is a good coach and Cuban is willing to pay the luxury tax.  I still think Donnie Nelson is a terrible GM, but let’s see what he does mid-stream.