Friday, June 20, 2008

Nude Music Friday


In honer of Rapper Lil Wayne selling over a million copies of his latest record in the first week, which is the first time that's happened in 3 years, Its time to dust off "Big explains Rap Lyrics"

The song is the number one single of Wayne's new record, Lollipop. I'm sure you have all heard it before, its the one with him with the auto correct on his voice. Its hot, I'm not going to lie, but lets just take a look at what he is really saying. Wayne in Italics, my explanation not.

Ow…
Ow...
Uh Huh No Homo…
Does he really say no homo, I've never heard this part
Young Mula Baby
I only assume that he's talking about himself, or the producer

I say he so sweet
Make her wanna lick the rapper

See how he spelled rapper, like the singer not the piece of paper, he's saying some girl, who thinks he's sweet, wants to perform oral sex on him.

So I let her lick the rapper
So he let her.

She she lick me
Like a lollipop
She she lick me
Like a lollipop
She she lick
Like a lollipop
She lick
Me Like a lollipop
She performed oral sex on me that was like someone licking a sucker.

Shawty wanna thug
This girl wants a bad guy, who is into HipHop and urban culture

Bottles in the club
She wants bottle service at the dance hall

Shawty wanna hump
She wants to have sex

You know I'd like to touch
Ya lovely lady lumps
You know I like to put my hands on your breasts.
Lil mama had a swag like mine
This girl has the same attitude as I do

She even wear her hair
Down her back like mine
We have the same hair style
I make her feel right
When its wrong like lyin'
Umm, I make her feel OK about lyin or maybe cheating(really don't know about this one)
Man
She ain't never had a love like mine
I am a fantastic lover of the likes she has never had before

Man
I ain't never seen an ass like hers
I think that girls buttocks is the nicest I have ever seen in my life

That pussy in my mouth
Had me at a loss for words
When preforming oral sex on her, I could think of nothing to say.

Told her to back it up
Like berp berp
I would like to have sex in the position of dogie style, and have you thrust backward at me like you were a large bus that "beeps" when it backs up.

And I made that ass jump
Like jerp jerp
And while you did that, I thrusted so hard that your buttocks bounced on impact.

And that's when she
And then she said.

Sh-Sh-She lick me
Like a lollipop
Sh-Sh-She lick me
Like a lollipop
Sh-Sh-She lick me
Like a lollipop
Sh-Sh-She lick me
Like a lollipop
She preformed oral sex on me like someone licking a sucker.
Shawty wanna thug
Bottles in the club
Shawty wanna hump
You know I'd like to touch
Ya lovely lady lumps

After you back it up
Then stop
after we do it doggie style for awhile, i want to stop doing doggie.
Drop It shawty
I want now want you on top of me, while in the sitting position, and have sex while you bring your vazeen down onto me.
Drop It
Drop it like its hot
Drop it like its hot
Do that same thing over and over in the rate of speed that is equivalent to someone dropping something that burns their hands.

Do do do it shawty
Don't stop
Keep doing it girl, don't stop.

Shawty said the nigga that she with
Ain't shit
She told me that her boyfriend wasn't a good person.

Shawty said the nigga that she with
Ain't this
She said her boyfriend can't do what we are doing right now.

Shawty said the nigga that she with
Can't hit
She said her boyfriend is an inadequate lover.

But shawty Imma hit it, hit it,
Like I can't miss
But girl, I'm going keep having sex with you as if I were in a basketball game, and I got real hot, and I just knew that when ever I threw up a shot, it was going in.

And He can't do this
And He don't do that
Your boyfriend isn't as good in sack as I am.

Shawty need a refund
Needa bring that nigga back
Girl, you should no longer be boyfriends with that guy, as if he were a bad Christmas gift from walmart, you should take it back and get your money back.

Just like a refund
I make her bring that ass back
Speaking of refunds, I'm going to treat your backside like one and my penis like the return counter, and we are going to do it doggy again.

And she bring that ass back
And she did just that.

Because I Like That
Because she knew I liked it when she does that.

Shawty wanna thug
Bottles in the club
Shawty wanna hump
You know I'd like to touch
Ya lovely lady lumps

Shawty
Wanna lic-lic-lic-lick me
Like a lollipop
Shawty
Wanna lic-lic-lic-lick me
Like a lollipop
Shawty
Wanna lick me
Like a lollipop
I Let her lick the rapper

Shawty wanna thug
Bottles in the club
Shawty wanna hump
You know I like to touch
Ya lovely lady lumps

Call me
Pick up the phone and dial my number.

So I can make it juicy for ya
So I can turn you on, creating a moist area in your underpants.
C-Call me
S-so I can get it juicy for ya
C-Call me
S-so I can make it juicy for ya
C-Call me
S-so I can get it juicy for ya
Call me
So I can make it juicy for ya
C-Call me
S-so I can get it juicy for ya
C-Call me
S-so I can make it juicy for ya
C-Call me
S-so I can get it juicy for ya
I have a stuttering problem, but I still want you to call me, so i can turn you on, thus getting your pantys wet and ready for insertion.

Shawty wanna thug
Bottles in the club
Shawty wanna hump
You know I'd like to touch
Ya lovely lady lumps

I get her on top
She drop it like it's hot
Again we change position to you in the sitting position above me and you sit down on me with great speed.

And when I'm at the bottom
She Hilary Rodham
Middle of the Bed
Give and gettin' head
Give and gettin' head
Give and gettin' head
Now we are going to take turns preforming oral sex on each other, Like Hilary Rodham Clinton did to Bill(I know it was really monica, not Hillary that did the oral thing, but who said rappers were smart?)

I said hmmmm I like that
Say hmmmm yea I like that
I said hmmmm yea I like that
hmmhmmm
That feels good.

Call me
So I can come and do it for you
Call me, so we can have sex.

Call me
So I can come and prove it for you
Call me, and I'll prove that I'm great in the sack.

Call me
So I can make it juicy for you
call me so i can, yada yada

Call me
So I can get it juicy for you


SO, in summation, Lollipop is about convincing a girl that has a man, that you are a great lover, you guys have sex, turns out you are right, she loves it, you love it, you want her to call you so you can do it again.

I love Hip Hop.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Silly Porn Stars

I'm sure her daddy is real proud.

In my experience I've never even met an "anal starlet" let alone enough to pick a favorite

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Greatest Invention Ever.

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to the Beer Belly Cooler

Check this out.

How fantastic is that. Of course I'd look like a uper prego chick with my already large mid section.

I hope you enjoyed that US Open

What a fantastic golf weekend right? We had Tiger coming back and forcing an 18 hole playoff with a guy named Rocko.
That sentence right there is good enough for me to watch just about any Golf Tourney, add the fact that it was the US Open, and you've just doubled my intrigue.
THEN add the fact that Tiger is coming off knee surgery and hasn't walked 18 in over 2 months, now I'm titillated more than a Chinese girl who just found a mini-house for her mini-poodle.

Not only does that sound great, but unlike the Laker-Celtics finials, it truly was great.

I hope you enjoyed it, because Tiger is now done for the rest of the year.

This from the Golf Channel

"He experienced a small stress fracture in his left leg about two weeks before the U.S. Open, which was causing him the pain, and ultimately the doctors feel that he needs ACL surgery and rest to get him back to 100%. Sources added that Tiger is in great spirits and wants to ensure that he comes back even better at the start of the 2009 season. Although his playing schedule is going to put on hold, he will continue to make numerous appearances and fulfill his sponsor and charitable commitments over the next five to six months."

That sucks. So this will be surgery number 4 or 5 on that same knee. How sorry would it be if that is how Tiger went out. A knee injury during the prime of his career.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Ohh lordy

So, This was a big weekend. As Brown continues his month long road trip for work/play, I was out of town from Thursday of last week till last night. Included in the fun was visiting some friends who are about to have a baby, camping in near 100 degree heat, and floating a river for 8 hours sat with only beer, a ham sandwich, and 50 jello shots to quince my thirst(and what a good job they did).

More on all that later, I just wanted to pop on and say, I'm back bitches.

No worries, the finial part of essay will be sometime this week, as well as a look back at one hell of a sports weekend. Lets not forget either that we will have a new NBA champion this week. Its the last real good week of sports till training camp opens.

To cleans your pallet for a moment, Here is a video of team USA beating the shit out of Barbados, in soccer, World Cup Qualifying match that most of you probably didn't see Sun. All 8(!) goal can be found here, and its only a few min long.