The most ridiculous shit ever said.

Ok, so I was driving back to my hotel from the office, and I flipped on the local ESPN radio affiliate here in Honolulu. I was treated to the afternoon drive-time program.

Not surprisingly, the talk around town is "How is Colt Brennan doing at the combine and where should he go in the draft?"

Naturally, these are homers, and they defend any negative commentary said against their boy. Fine. However, when it came to the "where should he go discussion" I heard a comment that made me damn near swerve into the Pacific Ocean.

"I wouldn't be shocked if Pittsburgh drafts Colt. Sure they've got Roethlisberger, but he won under a different coach. I don't think the new coach likes him, and they'll probably get rid of him in favor of Colt's style to open things up."

What. The. Fuck.

Please, someone attempt to explain the commentary without using references to "insanity", "drugs", "alcohol" or general "retardation".

Quick Hits from a Phone

Best moves in the West:
-Gasol to LA
-Kings dumping Bibby
-Korver to Utah

Worst moves in the West:
-Shaq to Phoenix
-Kidd to Dallas (Note the jinx by Big a few posts ago...ass hat...never mention a parade)

Rumor that will make me jump off of Diamondhead because it should be the Mavs:
-Artest to Spurs

Racist side note:
You'd think that the Japanese would have learned what happens when they tried to invade Hawai'i...but you'd be wrong. They're everywhere.

WEEEELLLLLLLLLLL!

Two of my favoret guilty plesures are about to cross over. FNL star Taylor Kitsch (Tim Riggins) will play X-Men Gambit in some up comming movies. I'm so excited.



Hat TIP to The Big Lead

Jason Kidd, the man, the myth

I really don't know what to add to the whole Jason Kidd trade that hasn't already been said 100 times by everybody who even kinda watches basketball. So I'll just go with my take.

First off, I'm on board. Despite what most Internet people, and mostly mav's fans are saying, I don't think they gave up too much to get a guy like Kidd in here. Lets go with the reasons its a good trade.

1. Leadership.
A lot of stuff is being talked about how this team needed to get mentally stronger. Its no secret that the mav's were, for the most part, slapped mental in the that Golden State series last year. After that shitty sight, most people were ready to blow things up around here. I know I played on the Trade Machine for quite awhile seeing how I could get Garnett, or Kobe, or Jermain O'Neill in here. But the Mav's stayed pat, brought the same team back, and said, "don't worry, that just a hic up, we will be better next year." We all knew that wasn't a good idea, and the management finally agree with us fans about a week ago. They needed a leader. They had one player, Jerry Stackhouse, who would stand up at the end of a game with a snarl on his face, and say "Fuck you, we aren't loosing." Devin didn't do it, JET didn't do it, and Dirk rarely did it. The one way to get Dirk out of that role is to get inside his head during the game, and he folds like origami.

Enter Jason Kidd. Unlike before when the players on this team would look at their best player, Dirk, who then just looked back like "what?" they now have another superstar in Kidd who can say, Get me the ball, I will find a way to win.

A perfect example of this is this years NFL champion NY Giants. What was the best thing that happened to that team? Tiki left before the year started, and Shocky got hurt at the end of the year. Why was this a good thing. It took out some bad mojo in the locker room. When Eli or Plax stared looking around the locker room at the end of the year, where they would normally find a pissed off Tiki, or a mouthy Shockey, they found no one. So they had to look inside themselves.

That's what could happen here only in reverse. When people look around for leadership on the bench now, They don't have to look at Dirk to fire them up, or an aging bench player like Stack, they have Jason Fucking Kidd telling them how they are going to win.

2. Built better for More teams.

Several years ago when the Mav's lost to Steve Kerr and Spurs, they had one goal in mind, and that's beating the Spurs. They built there team around that idea that if you can beat the best team in basketball, you could win a title, and it damn near worked 2 years ago. They got rid of the point guard who couldn't guard Tony Parker, in Steve Nash. They went out and got some big guys to help defend Duncan, in Damp and Diop. They got rid of the shoot first, no dribbling, no defence mike Finley. They even added a former spur to be their coach! Every thing they did was to beat the Spurs.

Now the Spurs aren't the only team to worry about, as proof look at last year. Fast athletic teams gives them fits. Is Jason Kidd the answer to competing with those guys? No. BUT he does give the team an identity of there own. They are no longer the team that can beat the Spurs, they are the Mavericks, you have to find a way to beat them now. Only time will tell if it was a good move in that respect, but the Mavs most def have an identity now.

3. Ability for Josh Howard, Jason Terry, and Dirk to elevate their game.

I liked Devin Harris. I liked what he brought to the team. His slashing and quick defense will be missed. But as he got better, a lot of his team mates got worse. Its a simple only so many balls to go around thing. Josh Howard isn't as good as he was last year, neither is Dirk, and Jet looked like a lost player most of the time when he on the floor the same time as Harris.

Kidd will help this. It allows Howard to be more of what he is, an athletic 3 who works hard, and cuts well, and now he has someone who will know where he is, and what he is about to do at all times. The fact that Jason Kidd is a bigger point really helps out Jason Terry. I don't know if he will stay on the bench or start at the 2, but he now doesn't have to worry about playing the point at all. He is now a 2 guard for the rest of the time he and Kidd are both here. No more Jet bringing the ball up, no more yelling at him when he has 2 assists. He can just do what he does best and hopefully that will be a good thing. On defense, Terry can now guard the quicker, smaller guard while Jason guards the bigger one. And God only knows how Kidd will help out Dirk. More open looks, easier baskets. nuff said.

Now, unless your LA and you get a star like Gasol for just expiring contracts, you will have to give up something to get something in this League. Lets look at what the Mav's weaknesses now.

1. Depth.

Its scary to thing Eric Damper and Brandon Bass are your only two real big guys now, add that guy they got with Kidd in there if you want to, but I doubt the players much. How will this work against Shaq, Duncan, and Bynum? I don't know. Its a real concern playing against those guys that you have to have. Donny Nelson this morning said finding some back up bigs is his most pressing need right now, and with very little tradeable peices on this team left, I don't know how they are going to do it. PJ Brown is out there, does that make you feel any better? yea me neither.

2. The Future

The best prospect on the Mav's was Devin Harris. No question. But other than Mo Ager who has showed no signs of worthiness, he is the ONLY prospect on this team. The teams not old, per say, but its not young either. The window for this team before the trade was about 3 years or so. Now its only about 2. Giving up what could be a fantastic point is hard, but what happens if he turns into Damen Stoudamire, or Andre Miller? Both of whom where thought to be the next great point and turned into solid, but not spectacular players?

Draft Pics. I hear this one a lot as well. They gave up 2 first round pics. This year, and 2010-2011. HOPEFULLY these picks will be later first rounders. I'm talking 22 plus. Looking back at the drafts here are the few guys who are decent that got picked after 22:Daniel Gibson, Paul Millsap, Jason Maxiell, David Lee, Kevin Martin, Anderson Varejao, Leandrinho Barbosa, Josh Howard, Kyle Korver, Tayshaun Prince, Carlos Boozer, Gerald Wallace, Tony Parker, Gilbert Arenas, Mehmet Okur. That's 16 people who where picked after 22 that make a difference on their team, out of 210 plus pick. That's one out of ever 13 or so pics. Basically 2 a year. This is not the NFL, where drafting well is the only way to be a great team. If your not picking in the top 10 or so, you shouldn't expect to get a star. and only once out of ever 10 years or so should you expect to get a real solid player. Now if we become the Knicks, and start blowing ass in a few years, and that pick for 2010 becomes a lottery, then we got big time problems. But that chances of that happening are slim to none, Dirk, Howard and 3 guys can probably make the playoffs.

In closing, this trade puts the Mav's closer to a title this and next year, and further away from one after that. In toady's NBA, to be a legit championship contender, you need to be one of the top 6 teams in the league. The Mav's were right on the cusp of that a week ago, now they are still on the cusp, but if Kidd makes them just a little bit better, then they aren't on the cusp, they might even be one of the top 3. Time will tell, if this pick was worth it, but if they have the championship parade in a couple months, there will be a lot of crow to be eaten around the league.

Back, Bigger, and Full of it.

I would like to apologize for the past few days, Brown is off in Hawaii for work, i don't even know if the somas even know what a computer is, and I have been taking care of business with my family over the past few days, so sorry for the lack of posts over the past few.

Well, I'm back bitch.

To start off this short week lets quick hit some big stuff.

NBA

Number one, Dunk contest. Best I've seen in years. Birthday cake was greatness, Gay's off the suport beam was highly under rated, and Dwight Howard. Damn. If you didn't see it, here is an abridged verson.



Talking about Howards Superman Dunk, he said in an interview with hoopsworld, He said he "ment to throw the dunk in," because only superman could do that. Well done sir. Lets just hope he doesn't get into horse ridding. Too Soon?

Jason Kidd is finally a mav, more about that later today.

College Hoops

Kelvin Sampson, looks like you got your hair cut off. Look if you sleep with a snake, your going to get bit. The same shit that he did in Oklahoma, he did with Indiana, and now one of the better teams in the Big 10 may be suspended by the NCAA.

In a game that I'm sure made Brown smile, Texas Beat Texas A&M by a bunch, and Baylor lost to Oklahoma. Texas is now in my big 6, that the 6 teams that I think have a shot at winning the Dance this year. More on that later in the day or tomorrow as well.

MMA

I enjoy MMA, but I don't follow it like some of my friends. I did here this rumor that UFC might sign Kimbo Slice, so that they can fight him against Brock Lesner. I would pay for that.

NASCAR

Randy Newman, came from nowhere and proved not only does he "love LA," but he loves winning at Daytona as well. Didn't know the great song writer from all the Pixar movies was into racing? What ever floats your boat i guess.

***Correction, Its Ryan Newman that won, not singer song writer Randy*****

I hope that catches some people up. More to come today.

Mock, Yea, Ing, Yea, Bird, Yea, Yea, Yea

As you know, I am a big silly fan of the NFL draft. I will be doing several mock drafts throgh out the off season, and here is the first. This a pre combine, pre anything, and I only kinda thought about all those players that Atlanta cut today, but here we go.

First round.

1 Miami - Chris Long, DE, Virginia
This team needs about everything, except a running back. The sounds from around the league say Big Bill likes Howie's kid. I don't really know if this guy fits into that true 3-4 DE, but neither really is Jason Taylor, and look how well that worked out.

2 St. Louis Glenn Dorsey, DT, LSU
Most dominate player in the draft. Really shores up their run D.

3 Atlanta - Darren McFadden, RB, Arkansas
Perfect fit for McFadden, there is some other backs there that can help carry the load, while leaving McFadden the ability to hit home runs all day.

4 Oakland - Sedrick Ellis, DT, USC
Warren Sap is all but gone, and he was sucking when he wasn't. Ellis fills the whole.

5 Kansas City - Jake Long, OT, Michigan
Not quite ready to rock a QB here, so they take the best O-linmen in the draft.

6 NY Jets - Vernon Gholston, DE, Ohio St.
The Jets need to get better in a lot of places, pass rush is one of them. Gholston gives them that.

7 New England(SF) - Antoine Cason, CB, Arizona
I don't think this team will resign Sammuals, so a nice CB would be a nice fit.

8 Baltimore - Matt Ryan, QB, Boston College
Kyle Boler has had as many chances as humanly possible, and McNair finished the year on IR. Even if this team goes out and gets a vet, the best QB is a nice fit here.

9 Cincinnati - Calais Campbell, DE, Miami
The Beangles really need defense, all spots. Campbell is a great pass rusher with a huge upside. Might want to get a less of a "project" player, but his upside is too high to pass up.

10 New Orleans - Kenny Phillips, S, Miami
Same as above. They need D. Phillips can help the pass and run D.

11 Buffalo - Mike Jenkins, CB, South Florida
While the offense was mostly the problem last year, a nice CB like Jenkins gives this team a serious contending D.

12 Denver - Keith Rivers, LB, USC
Denver needed run help, and a LB who could cover the TE's such as Tonny G in KC. Here ya go.

13 Carolina - Ryan Clady, OT, Boise St.
Despite what a lot of people think, I don't see them going for a QB this year. Delhome is coming back, and they got Moore as a project/ future guy. Clady will help them protect Delhome, and open holes for their tandom running duo.

14 Chicago - Brian Brohm, QB, Louisville
Here come another QB! Sexy Rexy will stay, and probably start, but just one more year, then Brohm will take over.

15 Detroit - Leodis McKelvin, CB, Troy
Its never a bad Idea to take good solid Corners. Its ever better when you need one.

16 Arizona - Sam Baker, OT, USC
With Jones and Baker now at the Tackles, this team has two great bookend tackles.

17 Minnesota - Malcolm Kelly, WR, Oklahoma
Sidney Rice showed a lot last year, and Kelly will help Boom Boom's Chances in staying the starter.

18 Houston - Jonathan Stewart, RB, Oregon
Ahman Green and Jonathan Stewart will double team Def's next year.

19 Philadelphia - DeSean Jackson, WR, Cal
Might be a bit of a reach, but Jackson has that big play ability that Donavan really wants.

20 Tampa Bay - Jeff Otah, OT, Pitt
It is never a bad idea to draft OLine.

21 Washington - Derrick Harvey, DE, Florida
If Harvey can get to the QB with some regularity, this D becomes scary.

22 Dallas(Cle) - Rashard Mendenhall, RB, Illinois
A great complement to MB3, Fast, blocks well, can break a run open.

23 Pittsburgh - Aqib Talib, DB, Kansas
Go D gets better.

24 Tennessee - Limas Sweed, WR, Texas
Young needs a solid target, and the former Texas QB gets one with Limas Sweed.

25 Seattle - Felix Jones, RB, Arkansas
Alexander is on the downhill slope, and Mo Morris isn't the answer. Jones is used to sharing touches, and this will expancd Alexander's time in this League.

26 Jacksonville - Quentin Groves, DE, Auburn
The only thing that the Jacksonville D didn't do well last year is get to the QB. Enter Quentin Groves.

27 San Diego - Frank Okam, DT, Texas
They need help stoppin the run, Okam is a big sumbitch

28 Dallas - Reggie Smith, DB, Oklahoma
A bit of a reach, but Smith can play the nickle CB untill he is ready to start in place of Henry.

29 San Francisco(Ind) - Gosder Cherilus, OT, Boston
San Fran needs alot of things as well. Who ever ends up playing QB for this team, needs better protection than they got last year.

30 Green Bay - Justin King, CB, Penn St.
Al Harris and Charlie Woodson are both up in age, and Justin King can take over when ready.

31 New England - forfeit

32 NY Giants - Dan Conner, LB, Penn St.
Best OLB in draft, helps an already great D.

Second Round. Just for shit and giggles.

32 Miami - Chris Williams OT Vanderbilt
33 St. Louis - Ali Highsmith LB LSU
34 Oakland - Jeff Otah OT Pittsburgh
35 Kansas City - Dominique Rodgers CB Tennessee State
36 New York Jets - Keith Rivers LB USC
37 Atlanta - Phillip Merling DE Clemson
38 Baltimore - Patrick Lee CB Auburn
39 San Fransisco - Mario Manningham WR Michigan
40 New Orleans - Kentwan Balmer DT North Carolina
41 Buffalo - Pat Sims DT Auburn
42 Denver - Fred Davis TE Southern California
43 Carolina - Xavier Adibi LB Virginia Tech
44 Chicago - Carl Nicks OT Nebraska
45 Detroit - Erin Henderson LB Maryland
46 Cincinnati - Antoine Cason CB Arizona
47 Minnesota - Tracy Porter CB Indiana
48 Atlanta (from Houston) - Joe Flacco QB Delaware
49 Philadelphia - Beau Bell LB UNLV
50 Arizona - Branden Flowers CB Virginia Tech
51 Washington - James Hardy WR Indiana
52 Tampa Bay - Early Doucet WR LSU
53 Pittsburgh - Anthony Collins OT Kansas
54 Tennessee - Chris Ellis DE Virginia Tech
55 Seattle - John Carlson TE Notre Dame
56 Cleveland - Jamaal Charles RB Texas
57 Miami (from San Diego) - Chad Henne QB Michigan
58 Jacksonville - Charles Godfrey CB Iowa
59 Indianapolis - Curtis Lofton LB Oklahoma
60 Green Bay - Heath Benedict OT Newberry
61 Dallas - Earl Bennett WR Vanderbilt
62 New England - Devin Thomas WR Michigan State
63 New York Giants - Steve Slaton RB West Virginia

Its early, And I know i'm way off, but wasn't that fun?

Happy Valentines day

Ahh yes, what a great day this is. It is the day that men everywhere treat their ladies like whores. We treat them nice, take them out to dinner, or cook it our selfs, and buy them expensive things, all so we might get some crazy V-Day sex tonight.

Box of Chocolats - 20 bucks
Flowers - 40 bucks
dinner - 75 bucks
some "from the heart" gift, usually something you buy at Zales - 100 bucks

Total - 235 bucks

Hooker(decent) - 150 bucks, (not that I know thats just what i've heard)

Who gets the better deal? One you should get sex, the other just dosen't want you to get it in her hair.

Happy V Day sports.

Of all the people....

Despite what you think of the proposed trade between the Mavs and Nets, we can all agree that getting rid of the spare ass 0-11 shooting, OVERRATED Devon George is a good thing.

Well, not so fast. As of right now the trade for Jason Kidd has been put on hold due to the man I was so happy to see go, Devon George.

"The same George who recently announced a desire to be traded if his playing
time didn't increase in Dallas has taken advantage of a little-known league rule
to block this trade, most likely on a temporary basis but potentially for
good."

He even said.

"it's kind of messed up how all the fingers are pointing at me."

That's because you are to blame, you big douche. When in the world did Devon George become a basketball player that we listen to anyway? Now we got an unhappy George, a PG who KNOWS he was about to be traded, and some other GM's are crying that Stack said he wants to come back to the Mavs if he gets cut? What is going on here?

You know what happens now? If they can't work something out with NJ and George, we are about to get screwed in ass with a tuna can. 3 Things could go down, only one of them is decent.

1. George OK's the trade and it goes through.
2. The Mav's bring in another team that George OK's, and involve them in the Kidd trade. This would mean that we probably would have to give up more players, and or cash.
3. The trade gets stalled, and we have a team that knows the management doesn't think it can win a championship currently as is. And if this one happens, only 2 things can come from that.

• a. Our team sucks the rest of the year because the management gave up on them.
• b. We have to go ahead and trade Harris, for 50% what he's worth, because teams no we have to trade him.

I am so pissed at George right now.

Lets not get all antsy in our pantsy

I just want it to be on record that I am behind the trading of an over the hill bench player, an over the hill 3, a center that lost his starting job to Damp, and a point guard who in 4 seasons in the league is still nothing better than a speed drive the hole point guard, for the best point in the League, even if he is old as dirt and may only play a few years. Look at this starting line up and tell me it isn't good.

PG-Kidd
SG-Terry(doesns't have to run the point AT ALL anymore)
SF-Howard
PF-Dirk
C-Damp

Thats not bad at all.

For the record

I am wholly against the Jason Kidd to Dallas trade. It will set the Mavericks back by a few years and they will not be able to do anything in the playoffs. Don't make the move just to make the move.

That is all.

Here we go again

ESPN has just put this up. Jason Kidd to Dallas just wont die.

"Although sources say that the teams are still sorting out final details, this deal was described as "imminent" by one source close to the process after negotiations moved to an advanced stage Tuesday night."

"require Dallas to send 24-year-old point guard Devin Harris, veteran swingman Jerry Stackhouse, the expiring contracts of center DeSegana Diop and swingman Devean George and another player such as guard Maurice Ager to New Jersey for Kidd and possibly veteran guard Darrell Armstrong."

"A point guard of Kidd's caliber, influence and experience would undoubtedly please the demanding Avery Johnson, reinvigorate a team that has been lacking energy and confidence and supply Dallas' coach with a dangerous four-man core of Kidd, Josh Howard, Jason Terry and reigning MVP Dirk Nowitzki."

Don't know what to think of this trade if it goes down, but it should be interesting to watch.

It's Time, It's Time, It's Vader Time.

Or draft time. Either way i'm cool. I was thinking about how to bring up draft talk here on this site. It might be too much just for me jump in and start telling you how each team will act, and who they should go for, and throw 19 mocks in your face. So, seeing as how most of the people who read this are followers of the Cowboys, lets just start there.

Here is what people around the interweb are saying in their mocks about the 'boys. (click the link if you want to see their full mock, some are interesting as hell, like Miami taking a QB with number 1!)

Footballs Future.
22. Reggie Smith DB Oklahoma
28. Felix Jones, RB, Arkansas

NFL Draft Countdown
22. AQIB TALIB
28. FELIX JONES

Draft Tek
22 Aqib Talib CB Kansas
28 D Rodgers-Cromarti CB Tennessee St.

Draft Ace
22 Felix Jones Running Back Arkansas
28 D. Cromartie-Rodgers Cornerback Tenn. State

FFToolbox
22 Leodis McKelvin, CB, Troy
28 Felix Jones, RB, Arkansas

NFL Draft Dog
22 WR Malcolm Kelly, Oklahoma
28 RB Felix Jones, Arkansas

NFL Report
22 CB Leodis McKelvin Troy
28 OT Chris Williams Vanderbilt

Great Blue North
22 Aqib Talib DB Kansas
28 Limas Sweed WR Texas

Saturdays 2 sundays
22. Limas Sweed, Texas (WR)
28. Antoine Cason, Arizona (CB)

So right now, its looks like most people think Dallas will go corner, and runningback. Not a bad idea. But I found it interesting that there were no other RB's except Felix Jones, that only one guy had us taking OL, that people think Aqub Talib will last that long. Its good stuff.

Booooo this man!

NBA Basketball. Where amazing happens. Unless of course by amazing you mean having some fun at the All Star Weekend Slam Dunk Contest.



This is Dwight Howard. He is a man beast. One of the better power forwards/centers in the game. THE best young PF/C in the game. He also has crazy, jump out of the gym, leaping ability. Its hard to tell because he is damn near 7 feet tall. Its hard for people to see just how high he can leap because its so easy for him to dunk a basketball, because of his height. So how can he empress the Slam Dunk contest judges, and entertain the crowd no less? How about raising the basketball rim to 12 feet instead of 10? Its like making him 5 feet tall. If a 5 foot sumabitch can dunk a ball, that would win the competition hands down. Sounds like a good idea for Howard right?

Well not so fast there good buddy. The NBA has said no to Howards request. Thats cool, it would be hard to raise the rim during the contest, take too much time and that stuff. What? That's not it?

"They've ruled that changing the height of the rim, while easily done mid-contest with the help of hydraulics, clashes with their intent to apply as many standard NBA rules to All-Star Weekend contests as possible."

Here is what he did/could have done at last years contest.



Well done NBA, way to look out for the fans.

Douche.

How very strange

I was walking down Kalakaua blvd on the way back from 24 hour fitness tonight, and the strangest thing happened.

Before I get into that, let me set the scene. I'm in Hawai'I for 2 weeks for work, and I've already had a shitty flight over, only to meet Sal Paolantonio in the airport and, well, that's a separate tangent all together.

Anyway, I'm walking down a heavily populated street, and my mp3 player is on shuffle. Suddenly,the song "Bittersweet Symphony" comes on.

I know what you're thinking, "Hey, Brown, it's not 1997 anymore, fag!" To which I reply, go fuck yourself, fascist.

Anyway, I decided to mimic the video and keep walking into people while they had crazy reactions.

Who would have thought, fat samoan people get VERY pissed for no reason.

I hate this place sometimes.

Well done sir, well done

Bravo

Big's Childhood, the movies.

As a request from a friend, who likes our writing, but isn't' that big a sports fan, I am introducing a new weekly blog about something other than sports. I don't have a fun name for it yet, but it will be posted here on Fridays for as long as I can remember to do it. This is a long one, so be warned.

I don't know what it is, it might be the list Brown posted earlier, or maybe the fact I hung out with my young niece's and nephews the other day, but I have been thinking about my childhood recently. Then last night, I watched a movie called "Sky High" yesterday, a decent movie that I think I would be really into if I was still 12, and thought to myself, "what were the biggest movies of my childhood?" So over today I have come up with a list, Its a top 11 list, of the most watched 11 movies of my childhood.

So let me start by qualifying a few things. First, I'm calling my childhood from the ages of 6-14 or so, cuz that's all my mind can remember, because its filled with hops and bong water. Second, I didn't really watch a whole hell of lot of movies, my family didn't go to the cinema much, and I was really into playing outside, video games, and sat morn cartoons. It my young young years I think I would rather watch an episode of Thundercats than some kids movie on Disney Channel.
And why 11? Cuz everybody else does just 10.

Honorable Mention - These are the movies that I thought of but didn't make the cut.

Only the Strong(1993) - As you will see from the following list, I loved Karate movies. OTS was the only movie I have ever seen about capoeira, a "dance" fighting style. I tried so damn hard to fight like this. It was great.

Krush Grove(1985) - You know its good, cuz the spelled krush with a K! This movie probably started my love of Hip Hop. Its about how Def Jam got started and all that Jazz. Run DMC, Fat Boys, New Edition, and Beastie Boys all played themselves.

Van Damme Movies - I went through a big JCVD faze. Kickboxer, Lionheart, Bloodsport, Street Fighter, all pretty much the same movie, but I loved them all.

Silvarado(1985) - Still to this day one of the top 3 westerns of all time. Cast was great, and this is the first movie on this list I watched with my dad.

Transformers(1986) - There were two groups of kids that were between the ages of 4-13 when this movie came out, Transformer lovers, and GI Joe head. I was a Joe head, but this movie was still a big player in my house.

All right now to the real list.

11. The Last Dragon(1985)


Holy crap. Here is the plot summery from IMDB : A young man searches for the "master" to obtain the final level of martial arts mastery known as the glow.

How bad ass does that sound? I remember when I first saw this movie. It came on after cartoons on Saturday morning sometime in 1988 or so. I was 7-8 years old, and was shocked that I had never heard of this movie before now. I quickly rushed out and told all my friends about it, and how bad ass Bruce Leeroy was, and how he got the "Glow," but nobody believed me. Nobody had ever seen it either.

I didn't know what it was called, The guy at Take One Video hadn't heard of it. It was like the great white wale of my childhood. I swear it was the best movie ever, but nobody believed it even existed.

Then one fateful day a year or two later, I came across it again on TV. This time I called some people, and those who could watch it still speak of its greatness today. Its was that damn fantastic.

10. Airborne (1993)

Simple story; Surfer guy has to move to Cleavland, where there is no beach. He gets bummed until his folks send him his Roller Blades! Now he falls for a chick who is the sister of his biggest bully, and he has to win a big roller blade race to get on his good side and win her heart!

Now who wouldn't love that movie? It had a lot of the things that a young Big wanted in his life, roller blade prowless, talked like a surfer, and he got chicks! That was what I wanted to be for a solid 2 years. Hell its better than a Trucker or a Wrestler, which is what I wanted to be when I was 4-9.

9. Footloose (1984)

Gayest movie on my list, by far, but till this day I can't not watch it if it comes on. Its like crack. You do it once, its not bad, then you do it again and its even better, before you know it, you know all the words to "lets hear it for the boys."

So lets just start a little sub list of my weird movie loves, so far we got Karate, Surffer/Rollerblade, and now we can add Dancing to the list. I love me some dance movies. I almost put in Breaking in my HM above, but didn't.

I wanted to be Ren McCormack(Kevin Bacon), and I wanted to fuck the shit out of Ariel Moore. She was one of the first "hey now" girls of my childhood.


In case you lived under a rock for the past 20 years, and you have never seen Footloose, the plot goes as such; New guy comes to town where no dancing is allowed, He wants to dance, Fights the preacher, Throws a dance.

I have a feeling this movie was brain washed in my head because I had 2 older sisters, who loved this kind of stuff, at least that's what I'm telling people.

8. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

Ahhh yes. This green VHS was worn out in my player over that summer that it came out. One of the more popular games we played as kids was Ninja Turtles. It said a lot about a person as to what turtle they wanted to be.

Michelangelo - A Crazy center of attention kinda guy, the popular kid.
Raphael - The rebel.
Leonardo - The Leader
Donatello - The quite, smart type.
Casey Jones - The crazy mother fucker who liked to "burn things."

I wanted to be Raphael, but I knew in my heart I would always be Donatello.

7. Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)

Looking back at it now, the first Rambo, the one in the city was a much better movie, but this one, the one in the jungle, was the one I watched countless times as a child.

I don't really know what happened to all the shoot em up, crazy solider movies, but as a kid I wanted nothing more than to have a bunch of guns, and shoot a bunch of bad guys. Now a days its all about using super powers, and electronics and such to beat the bad guys. Just shoot somebody already!

FBP2 was so money in every way for a you kid. No real love story, no real story at all, just a guy, killing bad guys, saving POW's, and then sticking it to his boss. That's what I'm talking about.

6. The Karate Kid (1984), The Karate Kidd II (1986)

I had to put these two together due to the fact that I can't remember which one I watched more. There wasn't anything better than pretending to do rock the crane kick, or the drum punches, when pretending to fight.

Looking back at it, there is no way this movie could happen in real life. What self respecting mother would let her child kick it with an old karate master from okanawa and not think something special was going on.


The Cobra Kia was the best bad guys ever to be in a movie.

Ever.

5. Top Gun (1986)

How can you get guys to watch a chick flick? Answer, include lots of air plane battles, a troubled soul who loses his best friend, and one Ice Man.

That's what Top Gun gave us. Don't get it twisted this is a chick flick. Boys finds girl, falls for girl, can't get girl, then gets girl. Its what all chick flicks are about. What sets this one apart is the fact that all men can identify with Mavrick.

Because of this movie every little boy, including me, wanted to be a jet fighter pilot, and play sand volleyball with no shirt on.

I watched this movie with my parents probably a hundred times. Its one of the few movies that we could all pop in and be entertained for 2 hours.

4. Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (1983)

This had to be the first movie I ever saw in the Theater. I was a mear 2 or 3 years old, and it was greatness, one of my earliest movie memories. I almost just put all Star Wars together, but that wouldn't be fair to this one. Now a days I enjoy the second one more than the others, but this one was what I watched over and over as a kid.

Could it be Because of her?

No, i was too young to find that interesting.

Maybe cuz of all the black hero's, both clad and skin?

maybe. But I bet it was because of these guys.

Eeeehheetoya......BOOM

Yea, as a kid I loved the little guys.

3. The Program (1993)

OK, so first let me just say I had pretty cool parents. They let me watch just about anything that wasn't soft core porn, or anti-god. They had trust in me that I wouldn't talk like Eddie Murphy from 48 hours, or act as stupid as the kids from Animal House. They new I was a good kid that like sports, so when I, a 12-13 year old kid, asked if I could watch the Program, they were cool with it. And from that point, it was done.

Everything I did for the next 2 years was based on this movie. I would talk shit during football games the same way Alvin Mack did. I would pretend to be hooked on booze like Joe Cain. I wanted to bust my ass in school like Darnell Jefferson. It was a life style.

To this day we quote this movie. "Fuck you dough boy, I can read. See that shoe, it says Adidas." "You the motha fucka that got my baby sister pregnant. Haven't seen you around lately." "Because we all know, Cain is Able."

I could go on for hours, but you know what I'm saying.

2. Rocky IV (1985)


With out a doubt the best Rocky ever made. Great fights; Rocky vs. Drago.

Great quotes, "If he dies, he dies."

A person overcoming a loss of a friend.

The best training scene ever in a movie. Rocky in the woods, Drago doing roids.

And it single handled ended the cold war.

1. G.I. Joe: The Movie (1987)

As I said earlier, as a child you were either a GI Joe guy or a Transformers guy, as you can guess, I was a GI Joe head.

I don't know how many Joe's I had, but they were easily in the triple digits. I even had the special ordered Super Trooper, that you could only get with like 15 proof of purchases and 10 bucks. He was awesome.

This movie also merged two of my worlds. Joe's and wrestling with Sargent Slaughter. Needless to say I was like a pig in shit i was so happy.

The world was a better place when I was blue vs red lasers. There were no color barriers like Rambo, or sympathizing with the enemy, except you felt bad for Cobra Commander in the movie, but for the most part it was just good vs evil, and good always won.

Welp, that's this weeks non sports story, hope you enjoyed it. If you think I left something out, please, let me know.

The Brown Five - 2/08/08 - That's how timezones work

The Brown Five is a daily breakdown of five stories that Brown stumbled upon and cause his eyebrows to raise up a bit. This probably won't be daily because Brown has the attention span of a...hey look! A bicycle..

1) Here we go with PETA again
Pedro Martinez and Juan Marichal were in the Dominican Republic last week, and they decided to take in a popular sport of their home country. Problem is, that popular sport happens to be cockfighting. Have we learned nothing from Mike Vick? Come on! Sure it's legal down there, but PETA will protest the scene from "The Great Outdoors" where John Candy shoots a bear in the ass. Fuck it, PETA is the issue here, not Pedro. I'd like to just start kicking a box labeled "kittens" around the lawn in front of the home office.

2) Brian McNamee saves needles
For seven fucking years. Really? Everyone is okay in believing that, but we don't want to believe the athletes? If I'm Clemens's lawyer, I just say "he admitted to receiving B-12 shots, and that's the remnants of those syringes. Any steroid residue has been added since the shot was given, and is consdered tampering and is inadmissable"

3) Watch Illinois and Indiana last night
Good game from a couple of rivals. What impressed me was when a certain Jeffrey Jordan hit a key overtime jumper to make things close for Illinois. You might remember Jeffrey's father, Michael. Pretty good basketball player. I'd like to submit a new nickname: Jeffrey "Heir" Jordan. Think about it.

4) Manning to Tyree listed as "greatest play ever in Super Bowl"
Yeah, I'm okay with that. In the 20 some odd years I've been watching them, it's the only one that has made me stand up and scream and ask all the stupid people who were still sitting down "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FROM MANNING?" only to get blank stares like I interrupted a bunch of serious conversations because they forgot it that a GOD DAMN FOOTBALL GAME WAS ON AND IT WASN'T A MOTHER FUCKING SOCIAL HOUR. What was my point again?

5) I wish this was a joke. I'm still hoping it is a joke.
Jesus Christ, let it go.

Go white boy, Go white boy, Go!

With National signing day the other day, here is a video of Sam McGuffie, a running back from Cypress (TX) Cy-Fair. I have no idea where that is, but this kid is special, and he's white. Not that that matters, but it should just be noted. Jonny Vag Pants should be excited he will be playing for the blue and gold next year.



Big ups to Gerry at uncle rico. Read him if your interested in Alabama football and how they did, or just an overview of NSD.

Why I think the Rangers will turn it around

It's no secret that I've been a Ranger fan since I began watching baseball as a kid. I never played the game, mainly because I sucked at it (I have the coordination of a retarded kid who also has muscular distrophy), but I sure watched it enough.

Anyway, a certain hall of fame pitcher and Texas legend has always been one of my favorite players, and now that man, Nolan Ryan, is the new president of your Texas Rangers.

Do I think he really knows a lot about the business end of running a baseball team? No.

Is this just a publicity stunt to get more fans at the ballpark? Yes.

Will Nolan go old school in the locker room and go "Robin Ventura" on one of the younger players in the locker room? I'm looking at you, Freddie Guzman.

Either way, I think Nolan being involved will help us as fans of this little team remember the glory years and cheer again without thinking of Hicks and Daniels general stupidity.

Don't get the Robin Ventura reference or just want to see it again? Ok...

The Brown Five - 2/7/08 - How do you like your breakfast taco?

The Brown Five is a daily breakdown of five stories that Brown stumbled upon and cause his eyebrows to raise up a bit. This probably won't be daily because Brown has the attention span of a...hey look! A bicycle..

1) Nick Saban pulls off a coup
So, for the most part, America hates Nick Saban, right? Wrong. The man can recruit like a mother fucker in a very highly touted area of the country. 32 recruits including the nations number 4, 30, 38, and 55 ranked players as well as a quarterback who's first name is "Star". Does it mean they're going to win a title tomorrow? No. Does it mean that Alabama can come back to prominence in the SEC? Probably.

2) The Kevin Hart story is closer to Big's life than you think
Remember this? Kevin Hart makes a commitment to California. California and Tedford don't know what the hell he's talking about. Hart says he was duped and scammed out of money by a "recruiter". Turns out, Hart made the whole thing up. Fernley High School, Reno, Nevada...where dumb asses are born.

3) Shaq to Phoenix still confuses the world
But, hey, he promised Steve Nash he won't let him down. This is interesting to me for a few reasons. Shaq is making a step towards saying, "I know I'm not the guy here, you are. I'm supporting that." That's huge for Shaq. It also means that Shaq is pissed off, and he's going to take it out on Los Angeles, Dallas and any Eastern conference team that comes in his way. At least we get to see Dampier get abused over and over again.

4) Cassell to Boston? Uh oh.
You know what happens when a bunch of aging veterans try to tack on to the hot team with the hopes they might come away with a ring? Failure. See the Lakers with Payton and Malone. Is Cassell an upgrade over Rondo? Oh god yes. Will the Clippers just let him go? I don't think so.

5) Duke won on Tobacco Road last night
Lawson was mosing, and the Tar Heels just look slow and struggling all night, but you got to hand it to Greg Paulus for draining six three pointers last night. Duke let it rain from the three point line all night, and that made UNC's size advantage pretty useless.