Please don't jinx the Rangers because of this

Okay, so it's a well known fact around these parts that I have an irrational fear of the "jinx factor". Seriously, I know everything there is to know about Texas Longhorn sports, but if you ask me I won't say a word because I'm afraid of jinxing my team.

That's why you didn't see many Mavs posts from me during the stretch run that counted. That's why you haven't seen any Rangers posts from me so far. The Rangers are doing well, and I don't want to ruin that.

With that in mind, it's the All-Star Break, so I thought maybe I could slip a post in and the Sports Gods wouldn't notice...

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How your Texas Rangers match up with the cast of "Major League"

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Jake Taylor = Milton Bradley

Jake Taylor's the beaten up, old, cast off catcher that the league has forgotten. He's still got the ability to play, but he's got a bad repuation now (his for injuries) and no one in the league's giving him a chance. He gets his chance and leads the team and is a great teammate.

Milton Bradley's an MLB cast off that the league has forgotten as well. He's got a bad reputation (him for being crazy), but he's not been given a chance by anyone. Since getting his chance, Bradley's been a leader on the team and is kicking tail.

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Rick "Wild Thing" Vaughn = C.J. Wilson

Both are pitchers. Both depend on a fastball that just flies and doesn't really move. Both are better known for being "that guy you'd sure like to party with". Both have control issues. I think this was a no-brainer.

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Roger Dorn = Michael Young

The "All Star" on the team who seems like he might be more interested in how his future financial prospects are going as opposed to playing. When on the field, has the tendency to "ole" balls at short. When actually fired up to play, not gonna find one better. By the way, this is Dorn from the first movie, not the bumbling idiot from the second. (I refuse to admit the third one happened, regardless of Bakula.)

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Rachel Phelps = Tom Hicks

I'd say this one explains itself...I just hope the Rangers aren't using a nude picture of Tom Hicks and are removing pieces of clothing after a win.

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Lou Brown = Ron Washington

They're both managers. They kind of sound alike. I'm pretty sure Ron Washington could be found selling tires just as easily as managing a baseball team.

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Willie Mays Hayes = Ian Kinsler

Speedy lead off hitters. Look like they play just because they enjoy playing the game. High range factors. I'm talking about Wesley Snipes and not "Black Thunder" Mike Tomlin.

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Charlie Donovan = Nolan Ryan

Doesn't really have a lot of power in the front office. Really just there so fans can see an old player. Likes to hang out and reminisce with the guys.

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Eddie Harris = Kevin Millwood

Kevin Millwood isn't exactly old, but with the way he's been pitching lately this seemed like a fair comparison. First of all, he seems like a guy who would utter the phrase "you tellin' me Jesus Christ can't hit a curve ball?" Second, he seems like a guy who's hiding Vagisil, Ben-Gay, Vaseline and pepper juice all over his body.

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Pedro Cerrano = "Max Damage" Josh Hamilton

"If joo lookin fo da leetle home runh hittah..." All Power. All Bad Ass. Probably sacrifices chickens in the club house to a) divert his cocaine hunger and b) get more power.

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Harry Doyle = Josh Lewin

Yes, Josh Lewin is on television. No, Josh Llewyn does not have the voice of Bob Uecker. However, the enthusiasm that Lewin has on the smallest thing that happens in a game, just seems like a great comparison. However, if I had to guess, I'd say that TAG is the one getting drunk in the booth.