Normally, my trips are a single week and I immerse myself in local grub or fast food type eateries.
However, when I'm on a particularly long stretch, I will drive to the local grocery store and pick up some basic items to eat in the room, mostly breakfasty in nature with the snack food thrown in as well. One of these staples is a pack of bagels and regular cream cheese.
(Be patient, dick nose, I'm getting to the point of this post.)
I'm not sure when it happened, but somehow the cream cheese revolution occurred and no one told me. Gone are the days where you can confidently pick up a container of "Philadelphia REGULAR Cream Cheese" Oh no, now you've got "Regular Strawberry" versus "Low Fat Strawberry" or "Honey Nut" or other fruitful flavors that are often just trying to mimick the mixture of cream cheese and jelly/jam.
Fine, I get it. Me personally? I'm a fan of the plain old cream cheese. So when I see a container that says "REGULAR" and, at first glance, has no distinct color pattern to suggest otherwise, I throw it in the cart, pay and go home.
Upon unpacking my groceries, imagine my surprise when seeing this:
That's right: SALMON FLAVORED CREAM CHEESE.
I don't know how to photoshop, so trust me, that's the real deal.
If you're curious, it's the grossest tasting shit you can imagine. It's like spreading bacon fat on a blueberry bagel...only not as tasty as that might sound.
And before you ass holes say it, that's like the second time I've ever used my digital camera. I was a business major, not a fucking photographer.